Cheating with “The Lone Wolf”

I am going to cheat a little today and repost a writing that I have posted before. I had this mentality recently after a long hiatus from it. I don’t like being the “Lone Wolf”  mentality and I was able to snap myself out pretty quickly. Persistence, motivation and drive to stay positive is paying off, and now I give unto you, lol,  Lone Wolf” repeat.

The Lone Wolf, the self proclaimed bad ass that decides it is time to separate from the pack and go it alone. From the outside looking in, and at the surface this looks like the place to be, but is it really? It has its positives. Dance to the beat of your own drum, live on your own terms, come and go as you please, no one to judge or downgrade your way of thinking, and no accountability for your actions in most cases. This seems pretty cool to be the lone wolf, until you go in the den of a lone wolf and see the truth behind the lifestyle. What can’t be seen from the outside is the pain that the wolf suffers from everyday. the worst part of it is, it is done by choice. All of this can be avoided if this wolf would just become part of the pack. All lone wolves have their strength and can get by with what they have and what they are capable of. What the lone wolf is missing is the strength in numbers. It is very easy to see that numbers gives you the upper hand. I can see like an eagle, but I have no smell. I need the other wolves to smell, so I can see. I need the other wolves to protect my back from enemies. I need the other wolves to give me a quick nip to the leg when I decide that something looks like fun, when in actuality it could be catastrophic. Humans are the same way. Being the lone wolf looks good for awhile, but eventually it bites you in the butt. Personally I like to have a pack of wolves with me to protect me, watch after me, and add to my strengths. I have a tendency to rogue once in awhile, test the waters of authority, or just go about things in my own way. That does not mean that I am going to leave my pack. They will always be there to lick my wounds when I return to the den. When you stay out there for too long the pack will move on. You will then be left in your den alone. When the end of the woods comes around, you are going to have regrets and wish that you would have done things differently. Don’t let your legend be the Lone Wolf, because if you go for the short term gratification of the lone wolf, you may regret it in the end

Akela, the Lone Wolf

Akela, the Lone Wolf (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


1 in 324,661,586

According tot he US population clock, at this very moment the population in the United States is 324,661,586, and negativity is everywhere we look, EVERYWHERE. As a person, if you are one of the less fortunate that swims in a pool of negativity, open up your eyes, look around, and embrace what you have around you.  Think about this for just a second. You have a 1 in 326 million chance of reading this if you live in the US right? This may seem a little satirical to you, but think about it. If you live your life in the negative and pity because only 10 people care about how you feel that should say something. Only 10 people of 326 million people give a shit about your negative feelings. Now compare that to 10 people that care that you are having a great day. It only stands to reason that your 10 people that care about your great day will grow, and your 10 people that care about the negative will shrink. The country has enough negativity, your 10 people do not want to hear more, in a short period of time that number will shrink. On the opposite end, the good 10 will grow. If you simply begin to be positive about something, you will tip the scales rather quickly with the number of people in your circle that actually give a hit, because they want to give a shit, not because they have to listen to you whine. If you are having any trouble finding something positive, here is one to start worth. You are lucky, 1 in 326,000,000 lucky to have read this post…(yes, i’m smiling) now share this with your friends so they can smile too.

Beyond the Badge

I just received an email from the Brain Injury Association of PA, (BIAPA) to notify me that my submission for presentation at the state conference has been accepted. I believe that my TBI is a badge of life that I am proud to wear. The title, “Beyond the Badge” is important to me because some of the things that plague survivors and caregivers of TBI are similar to the things that can plague emergency responders, and the military.

Survivors tend to seem recovered to most once the physical recovery is complete, for lack of better words. What cannot be seen is what lingers in the background for a very long time, and possibly forever, time will tell.  Those who wear the badge, and our military are strong and respected, in most cases, what lacks is looking behind the uniform to see what lies within the person.

The physical recovery, or the uniform are signs of strength, and that is good, it can seem that when the smoke clears from physical injuries, and the uniform comes off things are back to normal. The storm has past, what people don’t see is that the storm has just begun. Memories, dreams, situations, pride, lack of self esteem, guilt, depression, and many more are hidden from plain view in an effort to please the people around us, and give ourselves the feeling of strength.

The stigma that is associated with admitting we may need some support stops people from extending our arms for help. The results from this lack of reaching out can have catastrophic consequences, including the taking of ones life. The support is there, tap into it. Family, friends, co-workers and mental health professionals are all options. I am not going to say that any one is better than the other, but it a starting point.

With that all being said, I am a firm believer that the people around us, especially the mental health community can learn a lot from the person behind the badge. Learning by book is a needed and important tool in the education of professionals, but in my opinion learning from the ones that have experienced it, that are willing and able to articulate it, can be just as if not more valuable. The thought process and reasons for thoughts or emotions could be used to assist other clients by adding a new tool to the tool box. The information learned could be applied to care plan objectives leading to a faster, and or better outcome for the client.

I may be getting a little of course here so I will end this now. The takeaway from this is that if you are in the weeds and feeling lost, reach out for help, I did, and made a substantial difference in the quality of my life. Do not be afraid or embarrassed, either the people around you will agree and accept your willingness, if not, maybe they aren’t the people that you want in your circle to begin with.