Held in long enough

I want to begin this post by  saying thank you to those of you that have chosen to take the time out of your day to read my posts. I really do appreciate it, and helps me to stay motivated to keep on writing. With that being said I have updates from the previous post that I would like to share as well as some  news that I have been holding in long enough. It is time to share.

The update that I have is that I have sent in my submission to be a speaker at the BIAPA. Brain Injury Association of Pennsylvania. Now it is a waiting game to see if it will be accepted and I will be a speaker at the state conference in June. I have to admit that it  was a little bit scary with my finger hovering over the send button before I sent the email out. I paused on it for about 10 seconds before I actually let it fly. My goal to reach people and share my story to hopefully help others cannot be reached by blogging alone. It is time to come out of my comfort zone a little bit more in order to reach these goals.

There are three people that I thank mainly for giving me the strength and confidence to get me to take the next step. First is my wife Ann of course. She would always support me no matter what I want to try or do. If I told her that I wanted to fly to the moon she would volunteer to go get the materials to start building the spaceship. Next is Miss P. She is a medical professional that helped care for me when I was injured as well as a personal friend. When I told her that I wanted to take this adventure she thought that it was a very good idea, and is going to help me put my presentation together if it is accepted for the conference. Finally, a woman that can see the good in what I am doing and the one who talked me into sharing this blog with people closer to me instead of just strangers on the internet. She is no stranger to a challenging time in life, and if you have followed the last couple of posts you have read about her as well. So even though you three wonderful people are  a part in of my life in very different ways,  I want to thank you for giving me the boost, or kick in the butt, whichever is necessary to help me see my goals. It is because of the respect that I have that I am not going to fail.

With that being said I am about to drop the new news. I have been doing some research for a couple of months now that has taken a toll on me because the amount of time that I have spent on it. I have kept it only in my mind and have not shared it with anyone. This is like a double edged sword. In one way it is very hard to not share something that is so important to yourself. with your wife and family. On the other hand, it actually kind of surreal to have something in your mind that is not known by another human being. It is not a major deal to anyone that is going to hear this I am sure, but it is to me and that is what is important in life. I decided that in order for me to reach the number of people that I want to reach and be able to fully tell my story, I am going to attempt to have a book published. I have been writing manuscript for some time now. As far as dealing with the injury alot of it will be similar to what i have written in this blog, but I will go into greater detail. There is also alot that I am adding that I have not discussed in this forum. There are so many people that can benefit from just a little bit of hope or a good story of success. I have been blessed by god to have been given a very positive outcome after the injury that I sustained. Others can recover too if they just allow themselves to be positive and when they end up in the weeds come out with more speed and motivation.

I am going to leave this post right here because I do not want to make it so long that people shy away. More updates to follow. 

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Back on Track

English: This CT scan is an example of Subdura...

English: This CT scan is an example of Subdural haemorrhage caused by trauma. Single arrow marked the spread of the subdural haematoma Double arrow marked the midline shift Deutsch: Dieser CT-Scan ist ein Beispiel für ein subdurales Hämatom durch Trauma Einzel Pfeile markieren die Ausdehnung des subduralen Hämatoms Doppel Pfeile markieren die Mittellinenverlagerung (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am going to attempt to get back on track tonight with the traumatic brain injury topic. The last post or two has shown that I have been a little fired up lately. I do not regret what I posted, and I stand beside my posts 100%. It seems when I get in one of these downward spirals I tend to let my attention focus heavily on a topic.

Before I had this brain injury I was not the type of person that would air things out as loudly as I do now. I think that this can be both good and bad. On the good side I express my feelings whole to the T and nobody second guesses how I feel. On the bad side I have a tendency to let things get under my skin and I will speak until I am heard. I can not be convinced that I am being irrational and sometimes I am being irrational. Allow me to finish my thought and things will be fine.

No matter how much I try to think otherwise a critical TBI has changed me as a person. I have stated before that I take nothing for granted and that is very good, but I also get  a little hard to get along with. Life is too short not to be heard but I have to remember that I need to be heard while also being courteous and respectful.

I was told that the medication that I was put on would make me gain some weight. Of course I didn’t believe that because I am a pretty fit 42 year old man. I have to be in order to perform my job. Well guess what. It is starting to happen. I am trying to change the way I eat and the way I exercise, but so far I cannot keep up. It is not a lot of weight gain yet, but it is quick. I need to get with it here or I am going to put on too many pounds. I can’t blame the meds, I need to take action.

There is nothing that I can’t do if I want to do it. I have proven that already over the last year and a half. However I need to remember that I cannot do it all alone. I need to lean on the people around me that care about me and love me. A strong support system is the backbone to success after dealing with a life changing event or just a happy successful life for that matter.

Please take two things away from this post. Number one is that do not try to tackle a major life event on your own, and number two still thank your veterans as I asked on the previous post.